In this article you will find 7 steps to learn how to resolve a conflictregardless of whether it is your own problem or you are helping as a mediator, and what are the advantages of knowing how to do it.
Conflict resolution skills can be used in different areas: couple, family and work relationships. In any case, you must negotiate to reach an agreement that favors both parties.
First, it is essential that the parties involved know the advantages of solving the problem; Only then will they do what is necessary to solve it. So let’s see 4 fundamental reasons.
Why is it important to resolve a conflict?
Among the main advantages are the following:
Expand the perspective.
When we can understand the position of others and put ourselves in their shoes, we are able to see the conflict from another position. This gives us the possibility of opening our minds and knowing the experiences, beliefs and motivations of others.
Sometimes we blind ourselves and think that we are the only ones who are right. But the world is not “black or white”; there are nuances. And that is where we find the common ground that allows us to resolve conflicts.
Strengthens social relationships.
Achieving any goal is easier if we have people on our side. This applies to any type of relationship. Imagine that you have to carry out a project and you have personal problems with another partner. It would be a headache!
No one is exempt from having conflicts with others because there can always be misunderstandings. But likewise, we all have the ability to solve them and strengthen social relationships.
Increase productivity.
As long as you don’t waste your time on problems, you can focus on what’s most important: moving forward.
Continuing with the example of the conflict with the partner, imagine that instead of working as a team, they prefer to spoil the other’s work… neither of them would be thinking about the common good of the project. And as a result, the 2 would be harming the other members of the team and themselves.
If we learn how to resolve a conflict, we will be increasing our productivity.
You save valuable resources.
Sometimes, when we “get involved” in a personal problem, we forget much more important elements:
- Weather.
- Peace of mind.
- Energy.
- Reputation.
It is much smarter to learn how to resolve a conflict than to wear yourself out in a loop that leads nowhere.
Since we clarify the advantages of solving the problems, the most obvious question arises: How to do it?
How to resolve a conflict in 7 easy steps.
Depending on your personal experiences, you may have the ability to reconcile. However, not everyone knows how to control their emotions or how to “smooth things down.” So below you will find a simple 7-step method that will help you strengthen your personal relationships through conflict resolution.
Find the root of the conflict.
It is very difficult to solve a problem if we do not understand what the cause is. So it’s important that both parties agree to dig and get to the bottom of the matter.
One way to do it is to use the “why” technique, which you will find by clicking here.
Find a private and safe place to talk.
The only way 2 or more people can fix a problem is by concentrating. If, for example, they are in a food court, where there is a lot of noise and there is no privacy, it is difficult for them to focus on finding the solution and they may be intimidated for saying something that they do not want someone else to hear.
So find a quiet place where both parties can present their points of view without limitations.
Actively listen to the people involved.
It is useless to “make peace” and shake hands, simply for the sake of it; without solving the problem. Because it is very likely that the conflict will arise again.
That is why it is vital that the parties involved listen correctly to what others have to say. As I told you before, this is a way to put yourself in the other’s shoes and expand our perspective. And therefore, we can understand “the whole” and find the solution.
Investigate what happened.
Since you already know what the source of the conflict is, it’s time to investigate exactly what happened.
It was a misunderstanding? Was there bad faith? Disinformation? Pressure?…Avoid being prejudiced, listen, and with the information gathered, draw conclusions. Without forgetting that the objective is to reach a common agreement and solve the conflict.
Detect ways to achieve common goals.
At this point you already understand the problem, its causes and aggravating factors. Therefore, both parties can structure a path to a solution.
For example, if 2 co-workers have different points of view and neither gives in, a solution to resolve the conflict may be involve a third party that objectively helps them make decisions.
The fundamental thing, regardless of the problem or the context, is to define steps that lead to the solution.
Define the responsibilities of those involved.
Once you have the outline for the resolution, both parties must accept their responsibilities and create a kind of “manual” that they must follow.
Something as simple as committing to consistent and respectful communication can make a world of difference. Or, for example, in the case of a couple that has a problem with their finances and they don’t know how to save, they can agree to put all their expenses in an excel list that both have access to.
List the duties of all those involved in the conflict, in order to solve the problem.
Detail preventive strategies.
If you have reached this point, it is because the problem is already solved. However, you cannot claim victory; just as it arose once, it can arise again. But just as you already solved it once, you can do it again.
The best thing is to detail rights and duties in case of breaking the responsibilities of point 6. The parties must be clear about the common objective: to learn how to resolve a conflict. It favors them both!
Conclusion.
Effective communication is essential to solve a problem. Just as it is to be very clear about why it is worth solving.
Maturity and a lot of tolerance are required. It is not always easy…However, resolving this type of situation makes you grow as a person, opens many doors for you and will improve all your relationships.
We hope this information will be of great help to you 🙂
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